What Color Was Your School Bus?

Have you ever wondered why people talk about the "yellow" school bus? This has always blown my mind a bit because it's not yellow! I have never ridden, nor seen a yellow one. Even from kindergarten I was a rebel on this point, carefully selecting the Crayola yellow-orange crayon to color my school buses. Now I realize Crayola has probably renamed this color mango, summer sunrise, or some other creative name, but most of you know the exact color to which I'm referring. It's a much closer fit and in my opinion, the correct color is much closer to orange than it is yellow, anyway. I think most don't put as much thought into it as I have and have just bought into our culture's labels of things (ex. We park in driveways and drive on parkways. What is that about?), but You Know What? This happens to be one of the many random subjects I have spent time pondering and wanted to share. I can guarantee if I ever do have children, I will assure them it's ok to be different and use the right crayon! What color was your school bus?

My Pore Face

I've been hearing about more and more cases of Melanoma lately and decided it was time to see the Dermatologist. I have a few moles, to say the least, and have had some removed in the past so I wanted to make sure everything still looked okay. As I patiently waited for the doctor and decked out in my paper tablecloth, the Nurse Practitioner enters and introduces herself. She then says, "Are you here to see about your acne?". To which I reply, "Well, we can talk about that, but I'm really here to have my moles checked." HA! Normally I would have been offended, but instead found it hilarious for some reason. After my photo shoot which documented my skin for future comparison, I was sent on my way with a prescription for one of the two medicines I happen to be allergic to. Wow. "Umm, is there anything else I can take, since this one makes me violently ill?"
I just shook my head walking out thinking, "this is going to be some kind of day." My dear friend commented, "Only you, Abby." You Know What? At least I am starting to laugh at myself and not be so sensitive. My pore face.

Who are you, anyway?

Do you think it's important to know who you are? I'm not talking about the ability to list your basic qualities like you're filling out a resume. I mean knowing the raw, unedited, the good, the bad, the ugly, day-to-day, heart and soul, of you.
I would say it is not only important, it is absolutely essential to healthy relationships and to a more fulfilling life. If you don't understand yourself and what makes you tick-or get ticked off- then how in the world is anybody else supposed to understand you? Now I will say I'm not the best at understanding everything I do, say, or feel, but even when I think I'm on target I inevitably feel misunderstood by others from time to time. This makes relating difficult, to say the least.
I am a firm believer that your strengths are usually your weaknesses as well and it can be very helpful to identify some top-ranking qualities. Example: I have a strong personality with a "take charge" ability, which happens to be very needed in both my vocation and voluntary roles, on certain occasions. My leadership skills paired with my tendency to react quickly have proved extremely useful in many situations. However, my reactionary self, plus my faulty discretion can sometimes lead me to hurt those around me with my words and make me wish I would've kept my mouth shut. It's all about timing and balance.
To go a step further, if you are a follower of Jesus, allowing Him free reign of your heart and mind can bring about a deeper understanding of "you" than you might have ever thought possible. There is nothing more freeing than to let your Creator mold and refine you on a daily basis.
Why has all this been on my mind? As I mentioned earlier, understanding yourself can be a huge step in healthy relationships and is crucial to setting boundaries in them. I don't know about you, but I've had enough of hurtful and toxic interactions and have every desire to purge them right out of my life. On the flip side, knowing your heart can help you trust those around you that have the ability to bless your socks off!
What little I've said might sound like psychological mumbo jumbo to you, but You Know What? If you don't search your heart and mind frequently, and invite God to grow you, you will certainly miss out on so much this great life has to offer. Knowing who you are is a lifelong process but certainly worth the fight. I pray that my Lord forever refines the real me, helps me to love more, be hurtful less, and to glorify Him in all that I do. Above all, I hope the fire that is me, inspires or pushes somebody in my life to trust Him with their heart and life.
I'm learning not to apologize so much for the flaws I see in me, but to realize I'm a work in progress. My passion, quirkiness, strong will, affectionate, musical, practical self is happy to be alive today and is excited to see where this roller coaster that is my life takes me. What about you? Who are you, anyway?